Archive for January, 2011

New Lady Gaga fragrance – Uh, no thanks…

Posted in Culture, FAIL, Huh? WTF?, UGH! on January 31, 2011 by DaMook

Something tells me that this will not be a big seller – UGH.

You can’t make this stuff up.

According to sources in the fragrance industry hired to develop Lady Gaga‘s first fragrance, the pop star has requested that the scent “smell of blood and semen.

The idea is mildly shocking, but Gaga is not the first person to think of it.

Rad Hourani, who recently created a fragrance for Six Scents, listed semen as a source of inspiration.

To Gaga’s nose: We’re not so sure how to recreate the scent of blood, but here’s a suggestion for the semen: The pollen of Callery Pear or Bradford Pear trees.

Blood & semen? Yum! I want my lady to smell like that!

The de-evolution of culture continues…

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Perfect regime slogan: “Winning the Future” or WTF

Posted in FAIL, Huh? WTF?, Humor, The Regime, Thumbs Up! on January 31, 2011 by DaMook
ozbama

WTF

With “Hope” turning to hopeless and “Change” (radical transformation) becoming a turnoff, our dear comrade leader’s regime has been desperate for a new slogan. “Summer of Recovery” was a bust. With record deficits, out-of-control spending, crippling unemployment and failed foreign policies, the regime sloganmeisters believe they have come up with the next great mantra – “Winning the Future,” or WTF. WTF? It’s perfect! (story here from AP)

There’s a new slogan in town, and it’s a winner.At least that’s what President Barack Obama has in mind.

The president unveiled his “Winning the Future” mantra in his State of the Union address, and now the upbeat but amorphous phrase is part of every speech, policy and pronouncement coming out of the administration. It’s also emerged as a fat target for his Republican critics.

What’s next on health care? Where to go on energy and education policy? How to improve the jobs picture? It’s all about winning the future through innovation and determination, Obama and his aides have argued over the past few days.

It’s a juiced-up way for Obama to frame his initiatives after two years in which even some of the president’s supporters acknowledge that can-do verve sometimes was lacking from the conversation. What it means, though, is still TBD — to be determined.

After the long slog to stabilize the economy over the past two years, “clearly they’ve got polling that Americans are looking for someone that has more lofty goals and aspirations for America,” says GOP strategist Rich Galen.

It seems that just in time for the 100th anniversary of Ronald Reagan’s birth, Morning in America has arrived once again.

Just in time for the 2012 presidential race, as well.

“People need some optimism, they need to feel hopeful,” says Democratic strategist Karen Finney.

The “winning the future” construct, she says, couples a much-needed boost of optimism with the reality of the global competition that is afoot.

While the AP writer gushed over the zeitgeist of the new slogan, others seized the opportunity to point out the karmic (and comic) perfection of WTF to describe the regime’s policies (more here).

President Obama’s new slogan is “Winning the Future.”To Sarah Palin, it’s “WTF.”

Palin used the acronym at least three times last night in discussing Obama’s State of the Union speech on Fox News. WTF is also a phone text-driven phrase used to avoid spelling out the f word; it stands for “what the (blank).”

“There were a lot of WTF moments through that speech,” the 2008 Republican vice presidential candidate told Fox’s Greta Van Susteren.

I personally think WTF is spot-on. It perfectly describes just about everything this administration has done over the last 2 years. Something tells me, however, that it won’t last very long. Sooner or later they’ll have to catch on…

 

TSA bars more airports from converting to private security

Posted in BIG Government, FAIL, Government Folly, Unions Suck on January 31, 2011 by DaMook

While the TSA backed off on its Holiday travel grope-a-thon (more here), several airport authorities announced that they would be dropping TSA security for private screeners (more here). Since 2002 sixteen airports have replaced TSA screeners with private security and a larger number began considering similar moves.

Some of the nation’s biggest airports are responding to recent public outrage over security screening by weighing whether they should hire private firms such as Covenant to replace the Transportation Security Administration. Sixteen airports, including San Francisco and Kansas City International Airport, have made the switch since 2002. One Orlando airport has approved the change but needs to select a contractor, and several others are seriously considering it.

The Metropolitan Washington Airports Authority, which governs Dulles International and Reagan National airports, is studying the option, spokeswoman Tara Hamilton said.

For airports, the change isn’t about money. At issue, airport managers and security experts say, is the unwieldy size and bureaucracy of the federal aviation security system. Private firms may be able to do the job more efficiently and with a personal touch, they argue.

Airports that choose private screeners must submit the request to the TSA. There are no specific criteria for approval, but federal officials can decide whether to grant the request “based on the airport’s record of compliance on security regulations and requirements.” The TSA pays for the cost of the screening and has the final say on which company gets the contract.

Up until last week the TSA has remained “neutral” on these moves. According to this story (from CNN) that has changed. TSA head John Pistone is shutting down the program because he “sees no advantage” in continuing it. No advantage, that is, for the TSA.

A program that allows airports to replace government screeners with private screeners is being brought to a standstill, just a month after the Transportation Security Administration said it was “neutral” on the program.TSA chief John Pistole said Friday he has decided not to expand the program beyond the current 16 airports, saying he does not see any advantage to it.

“I examined the contractor screening program and decided not to expand the program beyond the current 16 airports as I do not see any clear or substantial advantage to do so at this time,” Pistole said.

He said airports that currently use contractor screening will continue to be allowed to.

During the grope-a-thon brouhaha Rep. John Mica (R-FL) wrote a letter encouraging airports to dump the TSA in favor of private contractors. Mica is not amused with Pistone’s move to shut the program down.

Told of the change Friday night, Mica said he intends to launch an investigation and review the matter.

“It’s unimaginable that TSA would suspend the most successfully performing passenger screening program we’ve had over the last decade,” Mica said Friday night. “The agency should concentrate on cutting some of the more than 3,700 administrative personnel in Washington who concocted this decision, and reduce the army of TSA employees that has ballooned to more than 62,000.”

“Nearly every positive security innovation since the beginning of TSA has come from the contractor screening program,” Mica said.

Of course, the union that covers TSA employees supports Pistone’s decision.

A union for Transportation Security Administration employees said it supported the decision to halt the program.

“The nation is secure in the sense that the safety of our skies will not be left in the hands of the lowest-bidder contractor, as it was before 9/11,” said John Gage, president of the American Federation of Government Employees. “We applaud Administrator Pistole for recognizing the value in a cohesive federalized screening system and work force.”

In its 9 year existence the TSA has not caught a single terrorist or prevented a single terrorist attack. They have, however, stopped a 4 year old boy with leg braces (potential terrorist) from boarding a plane to Orlando for a trip to Disney World (more here). And they’ve groped thousands of old folks and children because, you know, they may be terrorists. Even pilots and flight crews have been subject to TSA abuse, although they’ve been forced to modify those procedures (more here).

As with any other government agency, the TSA has been a miserable failure. At an annual cost of over $10B/yr it represents the type of low hanging fruit ripe for picking by congressional budget cutters. While private contractors may not provide a significant security advantage over the TSA, you can bet that they would be more responsive to the needs and concerns of the traveling public. You know, the folks who are paying for it.

tsa worker

TSA hard at work

Dear comrade leader channels Reagan – Huh? WTF?

Posted in Culture, FAIL, Heros, State-run media on January 28, 2011 by DaMook

obama-reaganAt various times over the past 3 years the pundits and dopes dupes in the state-run media have likened our dear comrade leader to “a sort-of God,” Abraham Lincoln, the second coming of FDR, and yes, even Superman. As reality sinks in and these myths have been exploded, the left has been scrambling to find another mythical apparition for the enigmatic dear comrade. Following Tuesday’s flatulent SOTU speech, where we were promised more “investment” (deficit spending) with “targeted” budget cuts, the dilemma has been solved. He’s now the second coming of Ronald Reagan! (story here from the American Thinker)

You can tell that Barack Obama is in trouble when his minions and media lickspittles try to compare him to Ronald Reagan, whom he disparaged in the first of his two ghostwritten autobiographies. His aides had him photographed carrying around a book about Reagan, and spread the word that he was learning from the Gipper.

Obama, who earlier refused to acknowledge American exceptionalism as any different from the feeling of Greeks or Brits about their nations, is now trying to rebrand himself as optimistic (“We do big things” — SOTU, 2011), a builder of a more prosperous America, leader of the world (because we are going down the Spanish path of forcing investment in uneconomic power supply and “high speed” rail).

The latest outrage is that his friends at TIME magazine have put a photoshopped picture of Obama and Reagan together on the cover of their magazine for next week. It was introduced on MSNBC this morning, but is as yet unavailable elsewhere.

Ah yes, our dear comrade as The Gipper – that’ll work. While Time may be trying to show that the Reagan link is a good thing, they didn’t have a lot of love for him when he was president (more here from Pajamas Media).

Of course, you wouldn’t know it based on that cover or the new one, but Time wasn’t exactly fond of the Gipper when he was actually in office, as Noemie Emery wrote in 2007:

A look at Time’s archive for 1987 shows a drumbeat of attack, if not of derision, for the man and his plans and ideas. True, the magazine did have a column by the late Hugh Sidey, a centrist’s centrist if ever there was one and a man with an institutional fondness for presidents. He cut the old man a break every few issues. But on the whole, in a long series of fairly long stories, some of them featured on the cover, the magazine made room for a series of writers–Garry Wills, Lance Morrow, and George J. Church among them–to whipsaw the Gipper back, forth, and sideways as a poseur, a fraud, an out-of-touch airhead, a lame duck, a loser, a man dwelling in dreamland, a man whirled about by the currents around him, and, of course, wholly washed up. It had been a bad year for Reagan and Republicans, bracketed by the Iran-contra scandal and the stock market crash. Reagan’s foreign policy ventures in Latin America and vis-à-vis the Soviet Union seemed stalled. His nomination of Robert Bork to the Supreme Court had failed, and in November 1986 he had lost the Senate. As far as Time was concerned, the whole jig was up.

But let’s stuff all that down the memory hole while we’re photoshopping this whole fraudulent premise. If there’s one person in history that our dear comrade leader is so unlike as to be a polar opposite, it’s Ronald Reagan. President Reagan wasn’t a fake, a fraud, or a phoney. President Reagan believed that government was the problem – not the solution. President Reagan, who inherited a broken economy from the second coming of Neville Chamberlain, understood that bolstering private industry, not government, was the answer. President Reagan believed that America was a world power, not to be confused or equated with some 3rd world tinpot dictatorship. As a reminder, here are some of Reagan’s best quotes:

  • I don’t believe in a government that protects us from ourselves.
  • The best minds are not in government. If any were, business would hire them away.
  • The government’s view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it.
  • The nine most terrifying words in the English language are, ‘I’m from the government and I’m here to help.’

Does this sound like our dear comrade to you?

NY lawmaker wants ban on “walking & talking” – Huh? WTF???

Posted in BIG Government, Culture, Government Folly, Huh? WTF?, Nanny State on January 27, 2011 by DaMook

pea brain

In the race to determine which state can impose the most ridiculous nanny-state sanctions on its beleaguered citizens, NY is certainly a perennial top contender. In the pitifully small and simple minds of NY’s ruling elite, New Yorkers are just incapable of protecting themselves from the dangers of daily life. Thus, being the benevolent shepherds that they are, the ruling class must do what they can to steer their flock through the minefield of life in the Empire State. After all, New Yorkers, this is for your own good. These people are trying to save you.

Without supporting research, it is difficult to discern what type of threshold must be crossed to trigger a nanny-state reaction in the pea brain of a NY politician. The only known fact is that the threshold is exceedingly low, and it covers a broad spectrum of seemingly innocuous activities. According to this story the latest activity that must be banned is “distracted walking.” You know, like crossing a street while talking on a cell phone or listening to music. Huh? WTF?

After targeting distracted drivers, some New York lawmakers want to go after distracted walkers. They are looking to ban them from using iPods, music players and cell phones while walking and crossing the street.

At E.A.T. restaurant on Madison Avenue they still haven’t gotten over the death of co-worker Jason King, killed last month when a truck hit him as he crossed the street while listening to his iPod.

Jason was just 21 and his death and along with other accidents involving people using electronic gadgets while walking is why Brooklyn Sen. Karl Kruger is looking to ban things like cell phones and iPods for pedestrians crossing the street.

“We have people who are literally dying in the street,” Kruger said.

Dying, Kruger said, not because they are distracted drivers but because they are distracted walkers.

OMG! People are literally dying in the street! Not from gunshots or assaults, but from “distracted walking.” Oh, the humanity! They even found some sheeple who agree with this.

Charles Tabasso, 14, admitted he’s one of them because he listens to his iPod constantly.“I would probably get run over right now if it weren’t for my awesome parents,” Tabasso said.

His mom agreed.

“As a parent I am definitely in favor of banning these things,” Tullia Tabasso said.

And as a parent, Tullia, you’re an idiot for wanting the government to do your job for you. You’re part of the problem and the government is not the solution.

Some said they object to the move as an intrusion by government into the everyday lives of people — the nanny state syndrome.

“When people are doing things that are detrimental to their own well being, then government should step in,” Kruger said.

No senator Kruger, the government should not step in. Shit happens, and sometimes bad shit happens. Millions of people walk the streets of NY every day and it’s probably safe to assume that at least 50% of them are “distracted” in one way or another. As much as you would like to wrap everyone in your government-issue straight jacket, it is not the role of government to protect a few stupid people from harm by punishing everyone.

Where’s the beef? Not at Taco Bell

Posted in Culture, FAIL, Huh? WTF?, Humor on January 26, 2011 by DaMook

Watching commercials for fast food joints, you would think that Subway subs were stuffed with lovely meats & veggies; that Red Lobster serves delicious looking plates overflowing with mouth-watering seafood; and that Taco Bell tacos are stuffed to the gills with yummy, um, er, beef. These are known in the business as “beauty shots” and are not to be confused with the real thing. Furthermore, according to this story, the yummy beef in Taco Bell tacos may actually be some kind of “mystery meat.” Wait, WHAT? Where’s that damn chihuahua?

An Alabama law firm claims in a lawsuit that Taco Bell is using false advertising when it refers to using “seasoned ground beef” or “seasoned beef” in its products.The meat mixture sold by Taco Bell restaurants contains binders and extenders and does not meet the minimum requirements set by the U.S. Department of Agriculture to be labeled as “beef,” according to the legal complaint.

The class-action lawsuit was filed Friday in federal court in the Central District of California by the Montgomery law firm Beasley, Allen, Crow, Methvin, Portis & Miles.

Attorney Dee Miles said attorneys had Taco Bell’s “meat mixture” tested and found it contained less that 35 percent beef.

The lawsuit on behalf of Taco Bell customer and California resident Amanda Obney does not seek monetary damages, but asks the court to order Taco Bell to be honest in its advertising.

“We are asking that they stop saying that they are selling beef,” Miles said.

Irvine-based Taco Bell spokesman Rob Poetsch said the company denies that its advertising is misleading.

“Taco Bell prides itself on serving high quality Mexican inspired food with great value. We’re happy that the millions of customers we serve every week agree,” Poetsch said. He said the company would “vigorously defend the suit.”

The lawsuit said that Taco Bell’s “seasoned beef” contains other ingredients, including water, wheat oats, soy lecithin, maltodrextrin, anti-dusting agent and modified corn starch.

I knew it! That’s why I always get a case of Montezuma’s Revenge after eating at Taco Bell. LOL!

Taco Bell response here.

taco

Filled with delicious Mystery Meat!

Taxpayers bail out Fannie & Freddie for legal bills too

Posted in BIG Government, Culture, FAIL, Government Folly, UGH! on January 26, 2011 by DaMook

Back in 2004 the top officials of Fannie Mae were forced to resign in disgrace for an Enron-like accounting scandal that was designed to boost their bonuses and executive compensation (more here). Fannie Mae was also forced to pay hundreds of millions to settle lawsuits and fines by the SEC. At the head of this political criminal enterprise was Franklin Raines, appointed CEO by president Clinton in 1999. From 1999 – 2004 Raines received over $90M in salary and bonuses, of which, according to the SEC, $52M was “improperly awarded.” Raines, along with corruptocrat former senator Chris Dodd, was also part of the Countrywide VIP loan scandal. In 2008 dear comrade candidate employed Raines as a “financial adviser” because of his, um, extensive experience (more here). More on Raines extensive experience here (from Michelle Malkin).

While Raines and his plundering crew may have left Fannie in 2004, the legal bills associated with his criminal enterprise continue to mount. Thus far, the federal government has spent over $160M in legal fees defending Fannie & Freddie (story here from the NY Times) in civil lawsuits. Great – talk about adding insult to injury.

Since the government took over Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, taxpayers have spent more than $160 million defending the mortgage finance companies and their former top executives in civil lawsuits accusing them of fraud. The cost was a closely guarded secret until last week, when the companies and their regulator produced an accounting at the request of Congress.

The bulk of those expenditures — $132 million — went to defend Fannie Mae and its officials in various securities suits and government investigations into accounting irregularities that occurred years before the subprime lending crisis erupted. The legal payments show no sign of abating.

Not included in this $160M are the tens of millions in legal fees spent by the GSEs prior to the government takeover.

In addition to the $160 million in taxpayer money, Fannie and Freddie themselves spent millions of dollars to defend former executives and directors before the government takeover. Freddie Mac had spent a total of $27.8 million. The expenses are significantly larger at Fannie Mae.

Legal costs incurred by Mr. Raines, Mr. Howard and Ms. Spencer in the roughly four and a half years prior to the government takeover totaled almost $63 million. The total incurred before the bailout by other high-level executives and board members was around $12 million, while an additional $18 million covered fees for lawyers for Fannie Mae officials below the level of executive vice president. Many of these individuals are provided lawyers because they are witnesses in the matters.

After the government moved to back Fannie and Freddie, the Federal Housing Finance Agency agreed to continue paying to defend the executives, with the taxpayers covering the costs.

Jeffrey Skilling (former Enron president) got 24 years in the slammer for his part in the Enron scam. Ken Lay (Enron CEO) would have gotten a similar sentence but he died before his sentencing hearing. Yet the taxpayers are forced to defend the perpetrators of the same scams at Fannie & Freddie. It would have been cheaper to prosecute them and send them off to prison.