Boehner’s tears of a clown

With the republicans winning a majority in the House of Representatives, Rep. John Boehner (R-OH) will take the gavel as Speaker of the House from the Wicked Witch of the West in January. At a NRCC presser following the election Boehner got emotional as he described how becoming Speaker fulfills his quest for the “American Dream.” BLECH. This piece (by Nick Gillespie at Reason Magazine) rightfully rips Boehner a new one on his tears of a clown.

In one of the most shameless displays of political narcissism in recent memory, presumptive Speaker of the House Rep. John Boehner (R-Ohio) choked up on Election Night when it became clear that he was gonna get to bang the big gavel come January 2011. Of course he started crying! His longtime goal of “chasing the American Dream” (i.e. securing a big boy chair in Congress) has been realized like Gollum finally getting his bony paws on the one ring to rule them all. It’s powerful stuff, getting misty when you’re describing just how great it is to get where you’re goin’ to, especially when the destination is Washington, D.C. (gotta love how Boehner implies sacrifice on his part to enter Congress, where he’s been hanging out since the early ’90s). He wasn’t bawling when he described how shitty the past decade has been for regular Americans, that’s for sure. And he somehow failed to apologize for the GOP majority’s huge role in killing the budget as we know it back when President Bush was, well, president.

Compare his victory speech with Florida’s Marco Rubio, the Senate-elect son of Castro-era refugees from Cuba. Rubio masterfully – and with muy emotion – depicted his victory as the fulfillment of his father’s dreams and himself as an agent of the future. In short, it wasn’t about him or his petty ambition. It was about something much greater and grander than that. That’s the stuff of tears, friends, where you recognize the people on whose shoulders you stand and promise to pay it forward to the next generation. It may all be bullshit, but roses never smelled so sweet.

Gillespie goes on to explain that this isn’t the first time Boehner has shed false tears when speaking about an issue. Apparently this is part of Boehner’s shtick, a lounge act if you will. The best one is here:

And then there’s his celebrated meltdown during the TARP vote, when he urged his fellow GOPpers to vote for the shit sandwich that was TARP. Because, you know, the whole economy would get flushed down the toilet if Congress didn’t enact a bill in, what, 72 hours? Come on, Hank Paulson said so and he was even smarter than Timmy Geithner wasn’t he? TARP was the fiscal equivalent of  The Patriot Act and had to get rushed through a hysterical legislature if it was going to get passed at all. Jeebus H. Christ, we’re all just so lucky the economy survived that first no vote! But there’s Boehner, a mix of Capt. Queeg and a used-car salesman, pushing for action action action and even stooping to red-faced tears to close the deal.

I’ve eaten servings of Skyline Chili (make mine a 5-way) that inspire more tears and more patriotism. And fewer trips to the bathroom.

It seems to me the message is clear: Whenever Boehner cries, somebody’s about to get screwed. And it ain’t Boehner, the No Child Left Behind advocate whose pathetic Pledge to America pledged only to spend about a plugged nickel less than the Democrats.

Write on, Nick. Boehner is part of the establishment republican country club – the ones Jim DeMint warned the newbies about (more here). These guys aren’t interested in saving the country, their only interest is in saving their own asses.

I’ve got news for establishment republicans. The TEA Party may not have run the table in this last election but they did pretty well and more important, they learned from their mistakes. They’re not going away and if you don’t get the message, you’ll be out on your asses in 2012.

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